Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Johnny Damon is an Idiot - Murder is Worse Than Steroids (HA HA)

I always thought Johnny Damon was a complete moron when he played for the Red Sox but for some reason I am noticing his stupidity even more now that he is a Yankee. Why does this dude insist on getting in front of the camera and opening his mouth? He might be the dumbest guy in Major League Baseball. And to top it all off, he throws like a girl and talks with an awful lisp. What a TOOL.

This clip is absolutely fantastic for the following reasons:
- He claims A-Rod hasn't committed a crime (Actually he has.  Importing illegal drugs from another country is a crime).
- He has known Alex since he was 15 years old and he is a nice guy (Because he is nice to you, that means he wouldn't do such a thing as use steroids?!?!  Nice logic, DUMMY!)
- Hannah Storm asked Damon what was worse than using steroids.  His response was "Murder".  He then proceeded to stutter for 10 more seconds trying to think of another example but couldn't.  (WTF!!  HA HA)

And nice freakin' hair buddy.  I hope to God your wife didn't tell you that was a good look.  You are starting to resemble the Guido Beach clowns from New Jersey.  I guess you just adapt to your environment like a really slow chameleon.  The Unfrozen Caveman style served you a lot better.  At least then you had an excuse for being so F'n stupid.  
This interview below from WFAN the other day is almost as good.  The two awesome quotes that he did not even mean to be a joke were:

"I'm Not walking into a bathroom stall with Another Man - I don't believe in that." 

"Maybe some other guys want to do that kind of stuff, but I'm not getting into a bathroom stall with anyone."

Johnny Damon just sucks at life.  I kind of feel bad for him at times until I realize that he is a hell of a lot richer than I will ever be and is living the good life.  Doh!!!  I guess I suck now...

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